They're HERE!

Well, we left to Napa on Saturday and didn't get back until last night, Thursday. Six agonizingly long days and all I wanted to think about was DOGS! Especially my potential BC puppy, and was so worried the litter would be small and I would have to find a different breeder. (thought I was #6 on the list, but was actually #7.) Thankfully, my agony ended Wednesday. Seven Black and White pups were whelped, four boys and three girls, and since two families only wanted red puppies, they withdrew. Sooo....I am guaranteed a puppy! Yahoo!!!!!!!!!!!!! Here's a picture that Angie (breeder) sent last night. The pups were only 24 hours old.

A Border Collie for me??

I'm so excited I can hardly think about anything else. Since December, I've gone back and forth, back and forth and back and forth some more. Should I get another dog or not? After Coral died, my heart ached for another Golden. But I just didn't think that was going to be the right agility dog for me, and that's what I wanted next. I figured I'd get Daisy to trial, get more training under our belt, and then we'd start the serious puppy search, likely for a Standard Poodle.

Until Sunday. Our evening agility lesson should have been perfect. The weather was good. I had good treats with me. I was revved up and energetic and thinking positively. And Daisy just sat there. Didn't want out of her crate. Didn't even want to do circle work or hand taps. Certainly had no drive or motivation to work on our handling.

I knew it was time...for another dog. Stacy kept talking to me about Border Collies, and I just thought of them as neurotic, wild, out of control dogs. A blast on the agility field, but not as a house pet. Except her Jib and Keen are so wonderful, I kept considering it in the back of my mind. Stacy told me about a litter that is due NOW (yahoo!), and Ed said he would only consider a non-poodle as he's afraid I'd have the same issues with a Poodle as I did with Daisy and Chloe.

So....I have a deposit on a Border Collie puppy. The litter should be born in the next week, and ready to go home mid-July. I CAN'T WAIT!!!!!!!

Triumph in the face of adversity

This past month has been very, very rough. It's been a rough spell at work, compounded by what I'm sure is my own hypersensitivity and irrational thoughts secondary to perimenopause. Needless to say, I've resumed progesterone cream and DHEA. My last posts are very helpful - even though it was talking about dog agility, when we go through valleys in other areas, it strengthens us and causes us to reach outside of our comfort zone.

My other loss occurred two weeks ago on Friday, February 20th, with the loss of my precious Coral Annie. She was the last of my Goldens, and I miss her so much. Attached are pictures of my girl through the years.

Everything works together for good

Lately I've been thinking about how life has a way of working out. So many little parts and pieces, isolated from the fabric that makes up my life, seem sad. However, even disappointments, and yes, even losses, have a way of making sense, of giving meaning to life, and they help us to look for doors that may otherwise have gone unnoticed.

In 2002 I fell in love with a little Pomeranian named Taz. I loved that dog, and in my heart he belonged to me. It was the same time Coral came to me. Ed did not want to keep either dog, both fosters. However, Coral was mine, mine, mine, and of course, stayed. I have often wondered why I didn't fight Ed and keep Taz, too. It wouldn't have been the first time I went against him and insisted on a new addition. In eleven years of rescue, the only time I cried with an adoption was with Taz. I sat on the kitchen floor and sobbed the night before he went to his new home. The bizarre thing is the home I left him at is not one I would normally have approved. Why did I do it? There were lots of reasons, mostly the recommendation of my veterinarian. Sadly, Taz got out of the yard multiple times. The last time resulted in his tragic death, as he was attacked by a coyote. I never thought I could get over that, and somewhat blamed Ed. I know Ed felt bad, and said I could some day have a Pomeranian of my own.

On January 1, 2006, I met a woman who wanted to surrender a Poodle and a Pom. Liz was out of town, so I thought I'd pick up the dogs, and if I liked them, would foster them and maybe even keep the Pom! It was just about the right time. However, it was the Poodle, Scooter, that captured my heart. I often wondered if giving up Taz was part of a larger plan for my life. If I'd kept him, would I have been motivated to take in a Pomeranian and Poodle? What would my life be like now if I hadn't met Scooter and become a Poodle person?

I think Poodles have saved my sanity. They were certainly an extremely healthy distraction during the course of 2006, the most stressful year of my life. It was the year Mom declined, and was finally diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and died three weeks later. It was in that same month that we had a horrible state survey. That was the same year the Board lost confidence in my abilities, although I'd handled each area of my job appropriately and just didn't have the finesse and skill at giving the appropriate "spin" to describe what was going on. In a word, 2006 was sheer and utter hell. Scooter, and then Chelsea, made it bearable.

In 2007 it became obvious that I needed to wind down the rescue. It was a very, very difficult thing to do, but by the time I'd decided I was so burned out that even meeting a family for an adoption caused me great anxiety and I had Ed do several of the final adoptions. The very last dog in the program was "Lola," a Standard Poodle.

Oh, how I had wanted a Standard. I didn't think I'd ever find a young Standard that would be safe with my pack of small dogs, so I adopted what was supposed to be a 7 year old Standard male, Seamus, and he turned out to be a very ancient boy. At the time I adopted him, "Lola" and her littermate "Marley" were living in my kennel, waiting for a home of their own. Marley found his home, and I thought Lola did as well. However, Liz did a number on me. She found out the name of the person who was adopting Lola, contacted her directly, and instead placed her own Standard there. I was livid.

Four months came and went, and Lola was still with me. I adopted out the rest of the foster dogs, and simply didn't have the heart to keep Lola isolated by herself in the kennel. Ed said she could come in the house while we looked for a home for her. It took all of two hours for me to realize "Lola" was never leaving me. Lola is now Daisy, and my very best friend in the whole world. We spend more time together than I do with any person or any other creature. We play agility, we cuddle, we talk to each other.

This evening I realized that the 11 years I spent in rescue were all worth it. It was difficult, it was grueling, and it was very, very stressful. The last 15 months dealing with Liz were especially rough, knowing her dishonesty. But now I have to thank her. Had she not pulled the rug out from under me, Daisy could have been with that woman, who turned out to be quite nasty, and who gave away a Standard that she adopted from someone else. God is Good! Through the twists and turns of life, even in events that were extraordinarily painful, He has shown his plan, and Poodles and Daisy were a part of it! I walk around my house and my property, and I feel so blessed. My life is not always easy, but it is VERY GOOD.

SUCCESS!

Hard to believe two weeks ago I was in the depths of despair and discouragement. I'd met a huge valley in our training, and couldn't figure out where I'd gone off track. Stacy, however, is right - when we have set backs, they are blessings, as they force us to seek out answers and make us stronger. That is certainly this case in this instance. We've had some of our best success in the last two weeks, and the biggest success is in my relationship with Daisy. I can't even begin to describe the relationship I have with this big Poodle. I love her so and she has my heart.

The remainder of this post was prepared to submit to SG's blog, asking people what sets them apart from big name competitors. In the end, I decided not to submit it. However, thought I'd blog it myself!
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I had no intention of adding yet another post to this very popular blog topic. After all, I have very little in common with world competitors. Well, maybe one thing. Possibly two, but that’s getting ahead of myself.
Neuro-typical individuals (interpretation – “normal people”) might say my single-minded determination and focus on one subject, one goal, one hobby, one interest, to the exclusion of all else, is pathological. I’ll admit, it does set me apart from most people. But this ability to focus has served me well in both my professional career and any other interests I have. It is this ability to direct all one’s energy towards a goal that makes serious athletes successful and sets them apart from the would-be competitors. For me, my interest in agility has turned into an all consuming passion. I have spent thousands of dollars on private lessons with the best trainer in my state. I’ve purchased thousands of dollars of agility equipment so I can practice in my own yard. Of course, one cannot be serious about critiquing one’s own performance without a video camera, so that has been among one of my recent purchases. When my two-year old PC was already outdated and couldn’t handle multimedia tasks, another couple of grand was shelled out for a brand new computer.

The price to “play” agility has not been limited to monetary expenses.

Last year my family and I were planning to vacation out of state. I could not fathom taking that time away from my dogs, and when I learned that both Greg Derrett and Susan Garrett were going to be doing seminars in my area, I bailed on the vacation and gave it away to a very happy co-worker! (My husband wasn’t quite as happy, I’ll admit.)

Yes, the agility bug has bitten me hard. I have every book and DVD you’ve done (okay, I’m still waiting for the 2x2 DVD- just ordered!), and am accumulating a collection of others from well-respected trainers.

Training for agility has literally begun invading my dreams. I came up with some great approaches to a current training issue the other night!
When I finally begin to trial and get my first Q, I know I will cry. Someday when we begin to earn titles, I will be elated (and cry some more). When we make it to the Nationals (gotta dream big!), I’ll have to come up with another goal.

You can see I’m determined and focused on becoming competitive in world of dog sports, and I have faith in myself and my dog that we can do this. It doesn’t matter that this is my first time as a handler, or that my dog needs some “polish” to shine on course. We WILL be successful!

All of that drive, all that determination, and that compelling fire in my belly to succeed in dog sports pales in comparison to my biggest goal.

At the end of the day, it won’t matter how many ribbons we have. My dog won’t care how many titles I can print after her name in my email signature line. She’s not going to care whether we ever make it to a trial or only practice in our backyard.

I know I’m competing with the “big guys” on nights like tonight when my dog waits on the bathmat outside the shower stall while I’m cleaning up. I’ve succeeded in my dog’s eyes when she revels in our play time, then contented and worn out, curls up next to me on the couch when watching TV in the evening. Later, she follows me to snuggle in bed for the duration of the night. When my dog freely and of her own choice gives up her former pleasures just to share time with me, and finds such joy and utter exhilaration in doing so, I know beyond a doubt that if we were never to trial, if we never earn a single title or play agility outside of our own yard, we’ve truly MADE IT!

Agility progress

I'm finally back in the swing of things after having a mostly agility-less month of November! Ed got my patio up and lights so I can practice after work. It's so cool! He's going to install some more so that I have less shadows. Here is a video of Daisy and I practicing last weekend (during the day):



I had a lesson last Friday evening and then went to an agility trial to watch Stacy last Saturday. Tonight I have another lesson, and am going to Stacy's in the morning for a handling seminar. Then we'll be going from Stacy's to Long Beach to watch the Agility Invitational, then to dinner with Kati, and then to Ontario to pick up Ed's mom from the airport. It will be a long couple of days (but fun!) for sure!

A Thankful Time

Hard to believe it's been more than a month since I last posted. It's been a very good month, and I had a lot to be thankful for this Thanksgiving. Here is a picture we took last weekend of the three of us. I am definitely thankful for my family!



My dad has been coming around nearly every weekend, or at least every other one, and was here for Turkey Day. Even greater, Kati and Suzanne came. It was the first time they were here for a holiday since Mom died, and it felt GREAT. It was the best Thanksgiving I'd had in four years.

While I didn't get much agility training in during November (was sick, injured my hamstring, end of daylight saving's time), I'm picking up speed again! Ed and Dad put in a patio cover over the concrete slab in what is now my agility yard, and Ed installed three floodlights. I need about five more to have adequate light, but this is a great start. I was able to practice just fine with what I have now, and the extras will just be a bonus.

Last night the girls and I had an agility lesson, and all I can say is each and every time I walk away thinking WOW, how gifted Stacy is in her teaching. She is able to cue right into where I've slacked off in my practice/training, and knows how to fix the issues. I think Daisy is really going to do well. I just have to work extra diligently on the obstacles, but I have no doubt we'll get there. The jury is still out on Chloe. She is still so timid in new situations, and frightened at Stacy's. Unlike Daisy, I've not been able to find her "happy/on" switch. I'm going to keep training her regardless, as she sure enjoys it at home. As I told Stacy, most of what I am enjoying is the improved relationship with my dogs. Playing agility is just the icing on the cake!

Today we went to an agility trial in San Diego. Was so awesome watching the dogs and learning! Got to spend some time with H & M from AgilityPoodle, and that was really neat to visit.